Casual Guild Forums
General Category => Humor => Topic started by: Gasmask on March 16, 2008, 06:44:51 PM
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http://www.x-entertainment.com/articles/0744/
The different edibles all seemed to mesh together into one large ball of terror, and I hard a hard time figuring out if the stuff staring up at me was breakfast or leftover puppy afterbirth the mothering dog down the block forgot to lick up.
Even if the only other thing you ate after this breakfast was oxygen, there's still a relatively high chance that your ass will grow hands and tie your intestines in knots to prevent this shit from ever passing through.
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TBH, the Swanson Hungry Man dinners don't taste THAT bad, if you like meatloaf (no matter what meat they say they're givin' you it's pretty much meatloaf in some gravy or sauce). The veggies are well... veggies with a light coating of movie popcorn butter and the mashed potatoes are palatable. The desert is usually actually quite good, and usually consists of an apple or cranberry crumble.
That breakfast though, makes me balk a bit. Pancakes look decent, I could probably live with the sausage (it's probably just meatloaf again), and there is just no possible fuckin' way you can get bacon wrong. If the hash browns are anything like the fries from the dinner version they're edible, not that great, but not completely horrible either. But the eggs... the eggs are completely new territory here. The consistency, mass, and my general dislike of eggs prepared outside of a few set ways just makes my stomach turn a bit looking at that picture. It reminds me of when I went up Montreal during a school trip in middle school and we had dinner at a sugar shack. Every table got a brick sized portion (literally, like, a brick you build fuckin' houses with) of omelette with some mystery ingredients mixed in.
NOBODY touched that shit. Dares and bets were made with money actually down on the table, but out of 100 some-odd students and faculty, nobody was brave enough to even prod those eggs with a knife. Just the thought of getting close enough to smell that thing again is enough to make me break into a cold sweat.