BLAT BLAT BLAT I'm block rockin this commode
So I'm sitting here pooing at work and I rock a courtesy flush as it's a really foul pile. Next think I know, water jumps up all over my cock. True story.
Oh man my ass just erupted like mount saint helens. The world hasn't known such catastrophe since pompeii. It's like poompeii.
about 5 minutes ago i sit down to take my daily shit, i pull down my pants and underwear, spread my asscheeks apart, and sit down on the toilet.the shit is going along swimmingly until suddenly i feel something on the tip / shaft of my dick. i figure its just my imagination, i mean afterall what the fuck could possibly be touching my dick right now?but then i start to feel it more and more intensly, until i reach the points where i realize that their is definately SOMETHING on my dick.due to this realization, the shit starts POURING out of my asshole (it was diarhea, im lactose intolerant and had pizza last night before i went to bed). i spread my legs, and i see my biggest phobia.GRABBING ON TO MY FUCKING COCKi jump up, shit still oozing out of my butthole, and start screaming and smashing myself in the nuts. this scuffle continues for maybe 10-20 seconds more until this ma fucker jumps off my dick into the bath tub (where the picture of the spider was taken).so i inspect my member and think to myself, "that was horribly traumatizing, but i didnt get bitten and atleast im never going to have a more terrifying encounter with a spider again in my life"thats when i realzed that worst part of all.during the skirmish with spidey (thats what i have decided to name him) i must have fallen over something, or simply just kept pooping because their is shit EVERYWHERE.theirs a trail on the wall, some piles on the floor, and the stench is fucking unbearable. to make it worse my parents have company over and the whole family is wondering where the horrific smell of shit is coming fromoh jesus im mortifiedcliffs: go fuck yourself, im terrified of spiders and one just grabbed on to my dick, READ MY STORY